Welcome to Complex Growth: A Different Way of Seeing Behaviour

Some ideas change what we know.

Some ideas change how we see.

Behaviour is one of those ideas.

Not because it excuses hurtful behaviour or removes personal responsibility.

It doesn’t.

It reminds us that behaviour is never the whole story. Every action, every reaction, every withdrawal, every outburst, every harsh word, every tear, and every shutdown is expressed through a nervous system shaped by development, relationships, and lived experience.

At Complex Growth, we begin with a different question.

Instead of asking,

“What’s wrong with this person?”

My understanding has been shaped by the work of Dr. Gabor Maté and Dr. Bruce Perry, as well as by my education, clinical experience, and personal healing journey. Through that lens, I find myself asking a different question.

“What might this behaviour be communicating?”

That shift changes everything.

It changes how we see our children. It changes how we see our partners. It changes how we see our coworkers, our friends, our clients, and, perhaps most importantly, ourselves.

When we begin to understand behaviour through the integrated lens of attachment, nervous system regulation, and human development, we stop seeing only what is on the surface. We begin to understand what may be happening beneath the surface. That understanding doesn’t remove accountability. It gives us the context to respond with curiosity, compassion, and wisdom while maintaining healthy boundaries.

This is why you’ll often hear me say that behaviour is communication.

Behaviour communicates needs, desires, thoughts, skills, adaptations, and developmental history. It also communicates overwhelm, stress, and disconnection. It communicates skills that have not yet developed and adaptations that once helped us survive.

When we approach behaviour with curiosity rather than simply trying to correct it, we create the conditions for safety, understanding, and growth.

That doesn’t mean every behaviour is acceptable.

It means every behaviour is understandable.

Understanding doesn’t remove accountability. It helps us respond rather than react, creating space for both compassion and responsibility.

That is where intentional parenting begins.

That is where healthier relationships begin.

That is where authentic leadership begins.

That is where healing begins.

This is the lens through which I see the world.

It shapes how I understand parenting, relationships, leadership, and personal growth.

Whether you’re here as a parent seeking to understand your child, a professional supporting others, or someone hoping to better understand yourself, I’m grateful you’re here.

Welcome to Complex Growth.

Together, we’ll explore attachment, nervous system regulation, human development, and everyday practices that help us cultivate authenticity, integrity, and potential.